The beginning is the toughest, and the beginning is what defines it.

Flute, the youngest
played a melody, played a smile
out himself and me
ran through the woods and
bathed in the sea
unknowing, uncaring 
of what the world was to be
Ignorance sweet

The drum, a young man
thought he had the world by his beat
could play the day in, and slow the night out
had the tune of what there was to be
thumping out of the red summer heat
Zealous will

The violin came next, a gentleman he was
he reasoned,coaxed strong character
out of gentle chords
searched for 
romance, friendship, kindness
to give and to take 
and find an answer to why and was
Unfathomable thoughts

Then came the Veena, gentle and wise
all there was to know, all self denied
a song for the gods, played a reverence divine
played by the shadows, played by the light
she could see and tell
she could feel and smell 
the reasons behind
Wrinkly Wise

Forever yours

I am this now, I am the moon
once gazed upon, in the far far space
that we often dreamed about
finding on our flights to
imagined fantasies

I am the little boy now,
gifted sea for the first time
my sea, by the sand
I run on, racing waves to the shore
to happiness

I am the conversation we had
when time had let us free
when we had let it be
this life as we know it
and moved beyond

Can you see me now,
in the hug those strangers share
in the smiles that come unannounced
in the beating heart that scores
a winning goal

I am here, really
I am here to stay
hold onto me, hold onto it all
I am here, always will be
Forever yours,

Then God save You

Do you exist, I asked him
On this paper, this line
This world that I live in
Did you create, or is it mine?

I May or May not be
he says, I think
I might just be a voice, an illusion lead
You might all be just accidents 
If truth be said

You eat some pride
with love, some sympathy
to live, a few lies of trust
I guess, just because you must

Will you go away then, please
I ask, in some teardrops red
And he says 'I can't'
for I live in your head

What If I clear them , then
trade faith, for some mind
and a new heart
to do what I do
I see him smile, he says
'then God save you

*Image Google

Me, We.

There are times when I want to shout out that all of you are jackasses just cause I am one. And then I remember someone quoted Bill hicks saying 'we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively.'
I guess that makes us all Jackasses. I am quite content with that.

The reason for my contempt of the world today really stems from my own desperate call for attention,and the realization that I am turning into nothing more than the mediocre, but I think I will just add it to the list of consequent happenings when the world does not stay the better place it once used to be. I sometimes do realize that I am drained of all charm and have stopped being an endearing entity a long time ago ( If I ever was one) but it's just so much easier to claim that people who don't like me don't deserve me. Goes well with my ego, goes well with the few who have still not left and definitely goes well with my very strong intent for remaining a pin headed wimp. Yea well, at least I can still go back and scream at my mom. She will never leave me.  Or maybe everyone'll want to be with me when I star in a rock band. I'll show them one day.

I think I have a very weird life going on right now. My work is something that I don't get paid much for even though 
I do work well. Just as much as the guy before me , and just as much I am supposed to. Yes, I watch funny videos online almost all day, take a 2 hour lunch break and smoke a lonely cigarette thinking about where it's all going to go. But the point remains that it is my right to not make things better and crib about it.

Hey! Everyone does it! 
You can't really ask much more of freshly out college graduate who is really sad he doesn't get to drink as much with the few girls who he thinks used to like him. Nor can you reason with the guy who used to watch a lot of movies he thought can really change the meaning of human existence. When it comes to me, you just have to accept the fact that real life is not as inspiring as a footballing video or a rap song. It doesn't pack much of a punch. 

Well then, I guess I'll just sit here , looking at the rain and hoping that the next girl I make friends with notices I am a lot more intelligent than the average guy, that I can buy her a drink and have a bike , and that is all she would ever want.
And then maybe, I'll think about coming up with a facebook update or quote something everybody likes cause they think they relate to it. Maybe something like 'Life is so simple. Why do we make it so complicated.' 
I already can name a few who will like that. That feels good.

But do remember, I am not just me. I am us. After all Bill Hicks was 'Cursed with Vision' and that holds. Even though I have no bloody idea as to what it means.

Defiant me

The million lines I write
do quite not utter my words
and the thousand listening ears
do all but learn my thoughts

The million hearts I chased
were all without love to give
for the thousand dreams that died
were mine and mine alone

The faces million I crossed
won't remember me at all
cause the thousand lives I shared
did not count for a lot

I stare, I know
I see you now
Oh life, as you ought to be
but never do think
I'll give you up
or on the defiant me

The best part about life is that it doesn't seem to have a last. Neither words or dreams.

Take a stroll, tonight

Take a stroll, my friend
Take a stroll, by the night
by the love you lived,
and the love you lied
by the wrongs you've led,
and the blissful rights
take a stroll, tonight.

Flash warehoused memories
by the roadside light
Sketch distant dreams
in a struggling mind
with the moon above,
and the silent skies
take a stroll tonight

Listen to the leaves
whisper Goodbyes
Talk to the pavement,
building squares for your strides
Turn around the corner,
make your own surprise
take a stroll tonight

The wooden bench is waiting
The flower park is life
Green by the shadows
Green by the light
Pick up a reminiscent
from those drunk delights
take a stroll tonight.


A Long time ago

There were lessons about her he just couldn't get hold of.Lessons he had come to learn but just couldn't find the reason behind. She was a lover,a friend,a mother.Someone who helped explore dimensions he never knew existed in his version of life, love and humanity.

And yet, he couldn't find the logic, and logic was telling him he should slip out.

The laugh was when he sensed perfection for the first time.He hadn't even looked.There was only sound, and it was perfect.He didn't need to look, he knew.
And now, he was looking at her, standing there, sobbing.

She had wanted to talk. She said they had to. It wasn't the right order of things to just fall apart when it was still summer.Autumn, she said, was the real test. The white dress nearly kissed the ground, which seemed to have risen up to love her back. He couldn't help notice the ground looked happy.She was beautiful and sad. An angel in all her grace .

Angel: We need to talk. If you would just let me know.

Man: There is nothing you can help with. I'm tired now.

Angel:Tired of what?Tired is for me to say.

Man: Yes, it is.And I'm waiting for you to say it, but you just will not, will you? I am waiting for you to go away. I'm tired of all the explaining and the needing. I want to be me now, I do not want a part of you.

Angel: And that is what has always been, You have always been you. I just help you stay you.I thought you knew.

Man:You don't understand.You will leave one day. Look down upon me, filled up by my woes and pleasures that you would want to let go of.Soon, it will all be too much for you and you shall fly away.You will want to fly because you can and I can't.

Angel: I don't see why you say that.You don't understand me, never have.I am a much bigger entity than you. Can't you see?

Man:I do.I also see that as the reason you stayed and listened, but even you can't hold all of me. I will spill, and you shall look away with sadness and disgust. An end is inevitable.

Angel:You will miss me, and I you. Please don't do this.It doesn't have to be. I can stay.I want to.

Man: I want you to too, but I need you to leave. I want to be standing,and I won't be if you carry me all the time and fly.I shall fall hard.I want to jump before you get too high.

Angel:Please do not.If you jump now, I'll fall down too. The bruise would show on my fair skin.

Man: I have thought enough, and I see, I am and am not,the center of my Universe.I have to be so,to exist. You come after.

*She doesn't understand.He has to do this.To be.To keep her beautiful in his mind.Always.

If I am already too high
And I die tonight
Come pick me up, Come cry
Tell me that you loved me
Stay by my side
Sing for some time
If I die tonight.